When your computer starts to act up, what is the first thing you do? You restart it. When a marriage starts to get “glitchy,” it probably needs a marriage restart. You have to restart a computer ever so often so that it can update and optimize itself for efficiency. It gets bogged down with the workload and needs a reset. Your marriage is no different.
Life is hard on a marriage especially when the act of being married is hard enough already. Life throws so many hurdles and challenges at us each day as individuals. And then we have to find the love and patience to go home and put our struggles aside to listen to someone else. It can be so taxing on each of us. When this happens, we can find that we are missing the connection. That connection is the knot that keeps it all together. Without it, everything else falls apart.
To keep a healthy marriage, you have to make the time to address what your relationship needs. More importantly, remove all the clutter of life and rediscover the foundation. A marriage restart can be anything from a vacation to a dedicated time at home. Time for the two of you to focus on having a real undistracted conversation.
The only real component needed to complete a restart is to be together and to talk. We lose sight of why we are together. What it was that was so special. No one ever said marriage was easy, but we could never have realized how tough it would be.
Doing a marriage restart brings the foundation of your marriage back to the top. You need to be reminded of what you are fighting for, each other, not with each other. Sometimes you feel like you are fighting for different things in life. With a restart, you can recognize how much you both are fighting for the same thing. Afterall, you are your best as a united force against the challenges of life.
Need some ideas on what to do:
- Marriage retreat
- Date night (out or at home)
- Movie night (at a theatre or home)
- Take a walk
- Vacation
- Drive somewhere quiet
Every marriage needs this. The world doesn’t have to be coming to an end. Taking the time to regain this focus is beneficial no matter the state of your marriage. Life pulls us away from each other unless we consciously pull ourselves toward each other. We have to fight to keep our marriage purposeful and focused on what matters most.
Taking the time to talk about our relationship is the best possible step we can take to maintain a healthy focused marriage. This life gets a little less trying when we are united in our journey. Take some time and hit the restart button!
Chris says
February 16, 2018 at 8:58 pmGreat article!
I may be biased, but this could be the best blog post I’ve ever read. After 17 years of marriage, going through this journey with you, and tackling life’s challenges together, we have seen the benefit of the occasional restart first hand (more than once).
This made me think of what you know is one of my favorite songs of all time, “I Thought I Loved You Then”, by Brad Paisley. I don’t deserve you (just ask anyone) ????.
You’re the glue that has held this family and our relationship together, even in the worst of times. God blessed me when He put you in my life, and I cannot imagine a day going by without you.
Thank you for putting up with me and my many shortcomings. Thank you for being the most amazing mom, and most of all, thank you for being you.
I love you, and that love only grows as time goes by. You are my rock!
– Chris